Why Unions are Bad (or Conversations with Cats at 11PM)

I stayed up late last night (yes, 11PM is late for me. I’m old, what can I say?) and didn't spend as much time playing with TheDexter & TheAnnabelle pre-bedtime as I usually do. The following conversation resulted.

For reference:  TD = TheDexter, TA = TheAnnabelle, Me = Me. Also, I have translated from Cat to English so those of you who don’t speak Cat may also enjoy this, and because my written Cat language skills are not nearly as strong as my verbal Cat language skills.

TD (sitting on nightstand staring at me): Play?

Me (laying in bed, facing the nightstand): No, it’s sleepy time.

TD (looks at TA, who is sitting on her throne in the closet, then looks back at me): My union steward says this “sleepy time” you speak of is not defined in our union contract. Play?!

Me (sighing): Actually, I believe it is defined in Addendum B, paragraph 3 as any time the human(s) is/are laying in the bed, especially when it’s dark, to facilitate the process of energy restoration.

TD (looks worriedly at TA, who shifts slightly, then looks back at me): My union steward does concede that is in the contract; however, we argue that since you did not fulfill the minimum “Daily Play Time” clause in the contract that you cannot yet declare “Sleepy Time”. Play!

Me:  No. I played with you earlier in the day, in anticipation of this, and that play time is to be included in the “Daily Play Time” calculations. It is sleepy time, go chase your sister.

TA sits up and stares menacingly at as both.

TD (nervously): I wish to file a grievance then.

Me: A grievance? About what?

TD (gulps): For being denied the opportunity to fulfill the duties for which I was hired.

Me: You were “hired” to chase, and be chased by, TA so we humans could enjoy “Sleepy Time”. By all means, please, go fulfill your duties.

TA looks sternly at TD, jumps to the floor and leaves the room.

TA (resolutely): Past practice indicates that is not true. While that may have been the “official” reason for my hire, past practice indicates that I was hired to be played with by you. If you do not play, I will file my grievance and I will file it all night long. PLAY!

Me (reaching for the cat toy in the night stand): Fine. We will play.

TD (distracted by the shadows created by a car pulling into a parking space outside our window): Umm, never mind, I think I found something more interesting. (TD jumps to the floor and begins to stalk the shadows before turning back to me) But, I reserve my right to file my grievance at a later time. (TD continues with his shadow stalking).

Me: Ugh. This is why unions are bad.

This is what happens . . .

whenever TheAnnabelle gets past the interior door.

She begs something fierce to get out, and we try our hardest not to let that happen. She actually did get past us a few nights ago, and ran to the nicest pile of leaves she could find. Little bugger is lucky she's so darn cute.

DST = No sleep

Daylight Savings Time (DST) is killing me. Or really the transition from DST back to normal time is wreaking havoc on me and the ATC household. I've always had problems with the transition to DST in the Spring. I'd have headaches and feel out of sync for a couple days, but then I'd be fine. The transition back to regular time has never been an issue.

This year things are different. This year there is TheAnnabelle and TheDexter. This furry duo, who are normally my partners in napping, have decided that their internal clocks are not getting reset like all the other clocks in the house. Nope, not this time.

TheAnnabelle has taken to waking me up at 3:00AM. Since I'm normally semi-conscious around that time (usually just enough to roll over to find a new "comfortable" position to sleep) it didn't seem like such a big deal at first. But each morning she has been getting more insistent that I actually WAKE.UP.ALREADY! purrrrr TheDexter has started to assist her in this mission. He wanders the upstairs meowing as loud as he can.

This morning TheHusband got up at 4:00AM because he just couldn't take it anymore. I followed him into the office at about 4:30. The office = refuge from the furry terrorists. *sigh* How sad is it that we have taken to hiding in our office to get away from our daily wake up "call"? Pretty sad, I know.

If anyone has any tips in regard to how to change the internal clock of a cat, the ATC house would be greatly appreciative if you would share your wisdom with us. We desperately need some sleep.

This is what happens . . .

. . .when you have two stalker cats.

From these perches, TheAnnabelle and TheDexter can keep an eye on what's going on while making sure their fuzzy little paws and their fuzzy little tails don't get stepped on. Plus, it has the added advantage (in their opinion) of allowing them the fastest access to the food dish, drip drips, or scratchies (all the reasons they really stalk us).

This is what happens . . .

. . . when TheAnnabelle manages to sneak into the office when TheHusband isn't home.

She decides that she needs to sit in TheHusband's desk chair. She'll even fight to stay there. Who knew purple and gold could be so comfy?!

(If TheHusband is home and she sneaks in, she usually heads for the closet or the far corner.)

This is what happens . . .

. . . when TheAnnabelle does the ironing.

"Does it look like I'm finished with the ironing?"

It's her favorite place to hang out while waiting for TheHusband or me to come out of the office. It's high enough that she can stay away from the annoying little brother (aka: TheDexter), yet close enough to the upstairs bathroom so she'll never miss a chance at "drip drips".

Jackpot!!

At least for the kitties. . . 

On Saturday I decided we needed to take drastic measures so TheAnnabelle would let me get some sleep. This meant moving a dresser from the guest room into the master bedroom. When I pulled the dresser away from the wall, this is what I discovered. TheDexter & TheAnnabelle were in kitty heaven. What was included in this treasure? 

- 18 toy mice, in varying states of destruction.

- One pen (that should have been in my purse).

- One shiny fuzzy ball (which are obviously not as important to hide as the mice).

I tried to take a picture of TheDexter rolling around in this stockpile, but everytime I tried he'd run away with one of the mice and wouldn't come back until I put the camera down. I wonder where the new stockpile will be.

This is what happens . . .

. . . when TheAnnabelle senses greenery in the house.

 

This demonstrates why we can't have plants in the house. TheAnnabelle would try to eat them all. The plant in the picture is a palm frond that we brought home from church and we only let her chew on it for a few seconds before putting it where she can't get it.

And, yes, the pictures are a little blurry, but it couldn't be helped because TheAnnabelle just moves that fast.

This is what happens . . .

. . . when certain kitties find they simply must be in the same window.

TheDexter and TheAnnabelle L.O.V.E. to sit in the windows and watch the neighborhood, especially now that the weather has gotten nice. While they do have a kitchen window seat designed just for them, they really prefer to sit in the upstairs windows (TheDexter finds he can be both brave and safe at the same time). And while there are three different windows they can sit in, this is the favorite and is worth being fought over.

Luckily, the screen is screwed into the frame on the outside. Not so luckily, it's not screwed in across the bottom. Now the two little miscreants aren't allowed to sit in this window until we can figure out a "fix" for the bent screen frame. It's way to tempting for TheAnnabelle, who actually did try to squeeze through there while I was taking the picture. It's also way to tempting for the bugs who want to come into the house.

This is what happens . . .

. . . when you have a smarty pants cat that likes to get attention (cat in question not shown in picture).

The Big Adventure

Last Friday I took the kids cats on a BIG ADVENTURE! And boy was it an adventure for all of us.

TheAnnabelle, looking for treats!

First, I had to get the cats in their respective carriers, which I had pulled out of the corner the night before (so they could get used to them a little). TheAnnabelle was easy, all I had to do was toss in some treats and she followed them in lickety split. But this was expected. She likes both treats and "caves" so this was almost heaven for her. Her only complaint was the treats ran out too quickly.

A Rare Moment

In the year (just over really) that we have had TheDexter (on the right), TheAnnabelle (on the left) has rarely let him get this close to just sit (play time is a different story entirely). AND I have never been able to get a picture of it. Sweet!

What is she saying/thinking?

Insert snack here!

TheAnnabelle is quite the character. I came across this picture of her and absolutely love it. What do you think she is saying or thinking? Please feel free to add your own caption. =)

.

Just because . . .

I haven't posted any cat pictures for awhile:

"I AM trying to sleep here. Can you take that camera somewhere else? Now?!"

This is what happens . . .

... whenever I don't get home when TheAnnabelle thinks I should. She may not be in the window as I pull up, but all I have to do is give her a few seconds, and . .. POP . . . there's her cute little head peaking down on me. Now I wish I could say it's because she loves and misses me so much. But sadly, she's merely trying to figure out her timing.

"Is the human at the garage or right in front of the house?"
"Is she carrying something or are her hands free?"
"Is she walking fast or slow?"
"Is she distracted from being late?"

The snow finally came . . .

7:13AM Update:

   

We ended up getting about 8"-12" over night, which was a lot of fun to shovel this morning. In this set of pictures you can see how our friend "Twiggy" just barely is keeping his head above the snowline. It's still snowing, so I say good luck to our little friend.

AND as a bonus to everyone, here are some pictures of our abominable snow cat (aka: TheAnnabelle):